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| There’s So Much to Be Thankful For |
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by Matthew Goodemote MPT, Dip MDT - December 6, 2010
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My wife and I went for a walk in the woods this morning. On the way home, we were talking about how things have changed for us in the last few years. In particular, how different I am now compared to how I was in the past
I have been intentionally avoiding picking up more “stuff” to do over the last few weeks. In fact, recently I was contacted through a friend of a friend to begin working on a project I have literally dreamed about doing for years. It was one of those moments where things really seem to line up so easily that it looks like something bigger is at work.
In fact, I have written about this in the past and how my life “unfolds” in front of me when I give up “my will” and allow “Thy will” to lead me. But this is that point where things get fuzzy. This is where I think that change my wife was talking about takes root. It is important for me to be sure my heart is behind what I do and if I am not sure, it is important for me to wait until I am.
You see, at the same time this “opportunity” arose, I was in the middle of several projects. My book is with a publisher, so now the real work begins. I spent several months working on a “Body Map” for my website and have a vision of where that is supposed to go. I am working with an orthopedic surgeon to improve protocols that are old and need some updating. In addition, we have all kinds of great things happening at the Wellness Center, and of course my family and my health (i.e. physical, emotional/psychological and spiritual) must be well cared for. So why would I add another project to this list of things to do? Fortunately, I have a wonderful family and an amazing staff that allows me the luxury of working on some other projects, but the thing that has made the most difference in my life is the peace that is in my heart.
My wife’s comment during our talk was not about the actual time in the past that I was with my family, my kids in particular, it was the way I was with them In the old days. I was around, but my mind was on other things and my heart was not at peace. The combination of these two factors made me a difficult person to be around. Sure, I was “helping out,” but my help was at times not helpful, and at other times my “help” was actually the very thing that made the situation need help. I was in the way. I was grumpy. I was demanding. I was critical and I was grumpy- did I already mention that part?
Along the way, I was blessed by a two epiphanies that literally changed my life. They occurred relatively close together but from totally different experiences. The first realization I had was that my life was filled with examples where my head, (my thoughts my beliefs and my way of doing things) was actually limiting me. It was me getting in my own way. I thought it was necessary to have a plan and once I had one, to stick to it, come Hell or high water!
The other major revelation was that I was choosing my life, or at least how I was living my life. Sure, I could tell you that circumstances were “shaping” my life, but the truth is I was using events to justify my actions and I was spinning the details so that it made it look like the events of my life were shaped by circumstances. I was convincing myself that the events were what mattered and I had to find out the “lesson” or “gift” in the experience.
Unfortunately, this strategy is completely arbitrary. One person will see the event as proof that life is working for the betterment of the situation and another person will use the event as proof that life is unfair and they have been dealt a bad hand in life. In either case, the focus is on the event rather than the thing that isn’t changed in the event. I refer to this as peace. The peace in my heart is not because of something I do or think. Because my heart doesn’t do or think…my body does and my mind thinks…but my heart is far simpler than that…my heart simply loves. My heart is open to “Thy will” because it is so obvious that “my will” is flawed and when “my will” is at the forefront, I am grumpy.
By noticing the peace and putting the peace as my priority, I no longer focus on the events. Events in and of themselves are not what really matters. Our reaction to them is far more relevant. I am also certain that it is not how we react to the events that matters most. Looking at our reaction to events is still putting the attention on the wrong things. What matters most is the peace in our heart. Yes, it is that important! Peace, that calmness between the action and thought, is the key to making a choice based on what your priorities really are.
The difference my wife notices with me and my kids is so striking because of the contrast. When I am in my mind, there is a lot of noise around. When I am in my heart, there is a lot of love around. Because of that, I am really available, in the present moment, when I am there with my family- and it has made all the difference.
Thanksgiving is that time of year when I remember most the incredible gift my life has been. I have been surrounded with love and for that I am truly thankful. My memories of Thanksgiving are of the people. It is almost as though the events have drifted into the background and details of what happened are there to be remembered if need be but what really matters are the people, and specifically the love the people gave and shared. I am blessed. I have a family that loves me. I am have a staff that loves me. I am thankful that I have realized what matters most to me and have put it at the top of my priorities. Sure, I could find more to do, we all can, but for me what I mainly want to do is give this incredible gift that I have been given…love.
My sincere wish to you and your family for a Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy the events of the holiday, but even more important, enjoy the love that is the foundation of this day!
 Matthew Goodemote is the founder and owner of Community Physical Therapy & Wellness in Gloversville, NY. He has degrees in Exercise Science, Health Science, Physical Therapy, and he is one of just over 250 in the world with a Diploma from the McKenzie International Spine Institute. Matthew is recognized as an expert in the fields of Physical Therapy, orthopedics, spinal disorders, sports medicine, and wellness. He is routinely called upon to offer tips and suggestions relating to health and wellness. His unique approach makes him a highly sought after expert at different ends of the media spectrum. He has received requests to participate in studies for scientific journals, and to write articles for trade magazines and popular press magazines such as Fitness to offer proven recommendations that stand the test of time. More of Matt’s blogs can be found at http://www.matthewgoodemote.com/blog/.
The viewpoint expressed in this article is the opinion of the author and is not necessarily the viewpoint of the owners or employees at Healthcare Staffing Innovations, LLC.
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